Polar Bear vs. Beaver: Which should represent Canada?

Recently, Sen. Nicole Eaton proposed that the government of Canada replace the beaver with the polar bear as Canada’s national symbol. Calling the beaver a “dentally defective rat”, Eaton suggested the change because "The polar bear, with its strength, courage, resourcefulness, and dignity is perfect for the part."

Of course, her proposal sparked outrage from patriotic Canadians everywhere, saying that the toothy beaver has – and always will be – the Canadian emblem.

Naturally, we assume the government needs our help in figuring out which animal to go with, so we’ve made a list of the pros and cons of each animal to determine which furry creature is worthy:

BEAVER!!!
Pros:
- Has been doing the job for 35 years
- Demand for their hide started up the Hudson’s Bay Company (The Bay)
- We owe them after killing so many in the fur trade
- Beaver hats are still stylish, regardless of what anyone says*
- The best cartoon, ANGRY BEAVERS, was based on this animal
- They’re the second largest rodent in the world
- They don’t hibernate
- They make the nickel look pretty
- They can chop a tree down with their teeth

Cons:
- They’re currently angering farmers in Ottawa because their overpopulation has resulted in destroyed trees, farmland floods, and their presence is threatening their septic systems, wells, and roads
- In the 1970’s, they were one of the primary carriers of the popular “Beaver Fever” (better known as giardiasis) causing many people to get diarrhea
- Even though they’re large, they’re still technically a rodent

POLAR BEAR!!!
Pros:
- Not a rodent
- Being on the toonie, it gives the impression that they’re $1.95 worth more than the beaver
- They’re the largest terrestrial carnivore, being double the size of the Siberian tiger
- They can smell their prey over half a mile away
- We owe them after putting on the endangered species list through Global Warming
- We also owe them after killing approx. 500 bears per year in Canada
- Like humans, they play-fight

Cons:
- Would likely kill you
- Don’t have a cool cartoon attached to them, only a Coca-Cola marketing campaign
- Though a beautiful and majestic animal, they don’t have 35 years of symbolic experience
- Even though the toonie is worth more, it’s only been around since 1996

So readers, would you prefer the POLAR BEAR as Canada’s new symbol, or would you prefer that the BEAVER stays? Either comment below, or send us your opinion to email hidden; JavaScript is required and get published in our next issue!

*Faux beaver hats, obviously

Thgdgfdff

baver
Hahathelolz

They missed that the beaver is a close reletive of the bieber (just a jo
ke no offense bieber)

Chick Hicks

Ha, ha, Justin Bieber is actually a good singer.

Chick Hicks

Well, beavers are awesome, and Canadian, but I can't choose my vote. Beavers rock. They might be dangerous rodents, but they're great. I mean, they've been Canada's mascot for years. Polars bears are endangered, mistaken, and awesome creatures. They might be bears, but, like, they rock. And their Coca-Cola link is so Christmassy. Merry Christmas, and, remember, I nominate the moose above all!
The Erased Masterpiece

Beaver, so much more history and the first thing that pops in my head when I think of Canada is beaver, then the second is mapleleaf. What history do we have about Polar Bears in Canada's history exzept maybe with the Inuits and there being global warming today but thats about it. I think beaver represents working hard and not giving up while polar bear, maybe strength, but really, when it comes down to it, beaver wins over all. I completly forgot about the polar bear appearing on a coin, no matter what value, maybe because people would rather use 5 dollar bills and you just raely see them compared to nickels. Who cares that they're rodents? Its like being rasist on the animal side, being judged just because you have a couple of characteristics that identify you as one. Stay strong and stay forever beavers, stay strong Canada!
http://www.facebook.com/jazziejane58 Lynn Macdonald

Hope we do it – the polar bear is beautiful. There is a lot of history with the polar bear – they have been around since and before we have. They represent strength, beauty are unique to our north. Have a picture of the polar bear and caption it the Great White North – Canada – beautiful. Let move on and have a new representative.