By Evan Yeong
No one expected the Spanish opposition, and last week Alejandro a) stole the invincibility statue that Heather had hidden and b) used it to avoid his elimination, which meant her getting flushed. His legs also work, so I guess no expected the Spanish perambulation either (that means “walk”, everyone). The contestants are down to nine, so is a merging on the way, or does Chris McLean have more tricks up his sleeve?
The contestants gather at the Camp Wawanakwa Coliseum, where they ready themselves for a wicked mishmash of the No Pain, No Game challenge and Phobia Factor, both from Season 1. A boxing ring lies in the centre, and just off to the side is the Wheel of Misfortune, neither of which inspire any confidence.
Players must spin the wheel to see who, or more importantly what, they’ll be fighting for a full two minutes. If they win their match they earn a point for their team, with the first to three points emerging the victor! The first few bouts turn out to be far less random than expected, but that’s what you get with Chef standing suspiciously close to the Wheel.
Zoey’s reward from winning the last challenge was not having to enter the ring, and having the Heroic Hamsters start the challenge with one point.
The matches are:
- Villain Scott vs. Fang the radioactively mutated amphibious shark [LOST]
- Hero Sierra vs. the mother of her creepy two-headed mutant rat pet [LOST]
- Villain Alejandro vs. his older brother, José [WON]
- Hero Mike/Mal vs. Izzy in a spider suit [WON]
- Villain Cameron vs. four mutant gophers [LOST]
- Hero Duncan vs. the cute mutant bird from last episode [LOST]
- Villain Gwen vs. Villain Courtney! [WON BY BOTH!]
Chris’s plan to have Gwen and Courtney beat each other to a pulp only half works, because after the fists stop flying the girls realize how much they’ve missed being friends. For putting a little warmth into the host’s “otherwise frozen heart” he gives them both one point! The final score is 3-2!
The Villainous Vultures win.
THE ELIMINATION CEREMONY
Most of the contestants believe that the teams will be merging now that there are so few of them, but Chris breaks the news that this will not be happening. Furthermore, the winning Villains will decide which Hero gets sent home, with the losing Heroes choosing the Villain being exiled to Boney Island.
The Villains take some time, but ultimately opt to let the increasingly more deranged Sierra return to the real Cody (much to Cameron’s relief). “You have a real Cody back home who needs you. Now run, Sierra. Run to him!” Chris reminds everyone that she’ll be swimming back due to the Flush of Shame.
The Heroes send Alejandro to Boney Island immediately, no discussion necessary.
Duncan takes Zoey aside and lets her know about Mike/Mal running juvie back in the day. He realizes that it must have been the evil personality who broke Sam’s Game Guy, Cameron’s glasses, Sierra’s smartphone, and his knife. Zoey is now pretty uneasy around her boyfriend.
Mal’s cover is almost blown when he faces Izzy in the ring (who is actually Cameron’s phobia). She tells him that he smells like “a honey cruller wrapped in rotten ham” and asks “Who’s Mal?” He puts his boxing gloves to good use and manages to keep his secret safe. Mike continues to be trapped deep inside his own subconscious.
In his nearly-knocked-out haze Scott tells Courtney he likes her, a response to her yelling at him to “wake up and smell the gloves hitting you in the face!”
Alejandro’s brother and he have never been on good terms, so they get to punching right away (body shots only, because “It is the family code: not the face.”) He only gets the upper hand when José disses Heather, which sends him into a righteous rage.
“Duncan Do-Right”, as Chris has started calling him, has had it up to here with being called heroic and a goody-good. Even so, he just can’t find it within himself to sock a bird in the beak.
At the beginning of Gwen and Courtney’s fight they’ve more or less patched things up. That is, until Chris puts on a clip show of Gwen and Duncan kissing from Sierra’s Gwuncan blog. As mentioned, once the blows cease they have a heart-to-heart. “Friends forever.”