TOTAL DRAMA ALL-STARS: "Zeek and Ye Shall Find" Recap

By Evan Yeong

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Last Thursday night brought us a fully reformed friendship, a vocabulary lesson (like you knew what “regatta” meant), and a reality game show host’s demolished cottage (“Mansion!”). The teams have also merged, grouping the contestants together into one big, dysfunctional family. There are no more Heroes or Villains, but still only one winner, so tune in to find out who moves on and who gets flushed! 

THE CHALLENGE

The contestants head to the McLean Spa Library pronto and surprise, it’s Total Drama’s 100th Episode! Chris even has a special challenge ready and everything! I would write about it, except that he’s promptly kidnapped by mutant freak Ezekiel.

Chef tasks everyone with finding him, reminding them that no host means no show means no winner means no cool million dollars. They have a few demands as to what Chris’s rescuer will get as a reward, all of which are quickly agreed to. Zoey reminds everyone that last season Zeke was living in the mine, so everyone gets flashlights and they’re headed underground.

There are a few hitches here and there, like Alejandro losing his boot between two river stones, but everyone eventually finds a mineshaft/hole to enter/fall into. Once they’re all down there it’s only so long before Zeke picks them off one by one in true horror movie style. In the end only Gwen and Cameron are left, and they come across Chris at around the same time Chef realizes that he should stop eating his feelings and take some action himself.

Hanging above a vat of toxic waste for more reasons than I want to list (he did not treat Ezekiel well in past seasons is all I’m going to say) with rats gnawing at the rope, Chris has had better days. Like when his cottage (“Mansion!”) got blown up.

Chef manages to swat the rats away, but leaves his spaghetti bazooka behind only to have the mutant use it on him. Cameron steps up and distracts Zeke. He succeeds, but is also buried in rubble brought down by the former kid’s acid spit. Gwen plasters the mutant with pasta from Chef’s weapon and saves Chris.

Gwen wins.

THE ELIMINATION CEREMONY

Having won, Gwen is gifted with permanent residence in the Spa Hotel, immunity for the round, and the ability to send someone to Boney Island. Alejandro’s the one who gets exiled. “First my boot, now this?”

This is the second week in a row to have no voting since Cameron is too injured to continue (he’s in a full body cast and a wheelchair inside a plastic sphere). Not being able to move your body means not being able to play the game.

Cameron is eliminated.

THE DRAMA

Mal reveals himself to Cameron before the poor kid gets flushed, but that’s not all he did to the guy. He starts by convincing Cam that everyone is gossiping about him except for “Mike” and Zoey, filling him with doubt and fear. After Cameron falls into a hole (which is in the mine, technically another hole) and manages to grab a root Mal promises to help and then, well, doesn’t.

 Scott and Courtney start dating. They accidentally kiss after she falls on him and he gives her a shoelace ring (which she puts in her pocket, because gross). They’re not two hours into their new relationship when Cameron, as part of Mal’s scheme, kisses Courtney. Scott believes Cameron’s insistence that she kissed him and they break up.

It just so happened to be Cameron’s first kiss, too. He says that it felt “like pressing your face against meat, but nice.”

Alejandro lost a boot. That’s too bad. Alejandro finds the monitor room, uncovers Mal’s secret, and steals a DVD of “Mal’s Greatest Hits” as an insurance policy. That’s pretty good.